Monthly Archives: December 2018

January 2019 Worry to Self-Trust A Dimensional Switch

Your parents more than likely used worry as a tool for their life-journey. You most likely have done the same.  You might have already discovered that worry weakens you instead of strengthening you. You may have realized that to use a tool such as worry can suck every bit of energy you possess. Worry is seen as love, used as a coping mechanism, and sometimes latched onto for getting something a human may want.  The approach is a negative seeking a positive. It is subtle and extremely powerful. It creates a gerbil cage of unmet desires. It doesn’t work.

It is a tantalizing approach, though to handling life because it gives humans a sense of control. If we can imagine it, we can control it. If we can foresee it, we can mitigate the potential of harm. If we can look at all possibilities of a negative outcome, we have prepared ourselves for whatever might go wrong. Our life-creating thoughts are used to counter some type of frightening potentiality.

Scientist have stated that humans will fill in quiet moments with negative thinking. Its almost as though we think we must fill our minds with negative in order to feel safe from a frightening world. So, we create an inhabitable inner realm to match an inhospitable environment.  No wonder so many people suffer from anxiety and depression in the western world.

This tendency to fortify ourselves with frightening possibilities starts early in our human development (and some would say in the womb). As early as three months old a child will discover they own hands and are likely to discover that these hands can be hurt if something were to pinch them. We might not realize it, but that is a monumental occurrence in a human life. That child now realizes they can be hurt, and their focus will be pulled more and more away from the spiritual realm from where they recently resided into what I call prevention-awareness. The child never wants to feel that pain again. The child’s mind is now primed to pay more attention to the physical and less and less attention to the information that is outside of their five senses. This is how the five senses gain their power and the telepathy, and other psychic abilities are put to the side. Each day that this child lives, information about all the ways to be hurt will be gathered and lodged for retrieval from the subconscious mind. And of course, that child will also be influenced by the fears of those in the environment in which the child is being raised. Children are wired to read the energy in the room. We are wired for survival and must maintain that survival.

The child is likely to experience some major blows emotionally as well. We all do. It’s unavoidable. Any human born into humanity is going to be hurt emotionally by those I call the Tall People. These people can pick a child up from a solid and trustworthy floor and take them through the air clear to the other side of the room. These Tall People have control of when the child will again land on a solid surface and where. These Tall People control the food. They decide what the child will wear and for how long.  Unfortunately, most of these Tall People have not gone through the awakening process and are living by the seat of their stress hormones and though they will try hard not to take it out on the child, they will fail miserably on some days and not so much on others.

So now the child knows there is danger of being hurt physically and is slightly confused about love. The same mother who will sacrifice her life for the child will lose her mind in the afternoon and scream at the top of her lungs words that are undecipherable and frightening. The father whose bent back is a horse ride on one day can change the whole environment within the same four walls when he walks through the door on the next. It doesn’t take imagination to realize that this scenario can be altered drastically by trauma. The feeling of safety has been drastically compromised and that information is lodged in the subconscious mind for future reference. It must be. Humans survive on the information we download.

And then that child begins to move in a world with others and discovers the joy and heartache of those interactions. A fragile identity based on acceptance from others is forged early on. It makes so much sense that humans would need to clutch onto something that would alleviate the stress of being human! Not only are we born into a stressed environment with Tall People in survival mode, but we then get introduced to children just learning a pecking order of influence and will find ourselves on the top in one group and on the bottom of another. Our fragile selves will receive a thousand blows before we even get out of first grade. We will worry ourselves from one human experience to another. We will see ourselves as victims and will suffer the circumstances that victim mentality manufactures.


By the time we are adults, we have done all we can to mitigate the dangers of being human. Some humans will develop methods of staying below the radar so that no future damage can be done. They marry for safety, convenience and predictability. They choose jobs that offer the same. They slay their souls to maintain normalcy and live by the expectation of others. Other humans will seek material wealth to fortify themselves from harm. All of this is fueled by fear and victim consciousness. And it can be transformed.


As a Spiritual Counselor, I am allowed to be a witness to the profound wisdom of humans and to observe that there is an intelligent energy that is constantly steering humans in the direction of their own emancipation. Each one of my clients has demonstrated there is a desire to be realigned with their own wisdom. That is why they sought help. They recognized they had gotten away from their ability to trust themselves. They want it back and there is a part of them that believes that this is possible. They are absolutely correct.

The power of the human mind allows us to extract meaning from our human experiences. We have an experience and then we categorize that experience for future reference. The unfortunate thing about that ability is that most humans are stuck in the overstimulated consciousness of flight, fight or freeze that requires us to interpret meaning from a fearful place. Our experiences often get filed away as a cautionary tale. We misinterpret people’s reactions to us, question our worth in the world and feel powerless to change our circumstances. An overstimulated state of consciousness must react to the world defensively and with hypervigilant eyes to maintain a sense of safety. That consciousness does not allow access to our psychic and inherent instincts. We are too afraid to risk trusting ourselves.

The great news about humans is that we can, and many are in the process as we speak, training ourselves to trust ourselves. We can learn to hear beyond the roar of survival mode. We can trust ourselves to handle the joys and challenges that life provides in ways that don’t have us experiencing the extremes of doubt and second-guessing. We can learn a different method of living. We can depend on the part of ourselves that isn’t afraid of anything to calm the part of us that is afraid of everything.

The first movement toward this beautiful possibility will be that the wound of our past mistakes will come roaring to the front of the mind as it wants to provide the innumerable reasons why it is dangerous to Trust oneself. Ignore it. That would be like a part of you listing the ways in which you misspoke when you were first learning to talk or when you fell when you were first learning to walk or when you got a wrong answer on a test. It doesn’t matter. You overcame those obstacles by focusing on what worked for you. Move forward.

Can you doubt that there is wisdom within you? If the focus was taken away from the fearful possibilities and put toward what you have accomplished, would you be willing to consider that you have something inside of you that can be depended upon to provide useful tips for living? Of course, you can and of course, you do. Inner wisdom does not ever go away. It can’t. It is a part of who we are.

After awareness of our tendency toward worry as a safety mechanism, we can then begin to change our mind. A useful mantra for reclaiming that wisdom and turning it into a mature and stable tool for living in a human body is: I possess inner wisdom that can be trusted. My body agrees.

This One change in thought said enough times can begin the process of rewiring the brain for a different possibility. Stay with it and be watchful toward what our inner would have you do next.


Humans Free Themselves

Spiritual Counseling Tip: There is something in each human that constantly seeks freedom. That something knows exactly what it needs to facilitate that freedom. One of the main things it “needs” is for the will of the human mind to get on board with the invitation to be free. Free from what? Worry is one of the most counterproductive tendencies that prevent humans from experiencing freedom. Worry is seen as love, used as a coping mechanism, and sometimes latched onto for getting something a human may want.  The approach is a negative seeking a positive. It is subtle and extremely powerful. It creates a gerbil cage of unmet desires.

A way to break the habit of worry is to recognize when it is happening. That will startle a human out of the sleepwalking approach to life that humans tend to use until we see that a particular method for living is counterproductive.   A mantra for this awakening can be surprisingly useful.

Mantra: I am willing to learn the practice of letting go of worry. My body agrees.